Frank Zappa (guitar, synclavier)
Steve Vai (guitar)
Ray White (guitar, vocals)
Tommy Mars (keyboards)
Chuck Wild (piano)
Arthur Barrow (bass)
Scott Thunes (bass)
Jay Anderson (string bass)
Ed Mann (percussion)
Chad Wackerman (drums)
Ike Willis (vocals)
Terry Bozzio (vocals)
Dale Bozzio (vocals)
Napoleon Murphy Brock (vocals)
Bob Harris (vocals)
Johnny ";Guitar"; Watson (vocals)
ENSEMBLE: (displaying Dummy #1)
Do you know what you are?
THING-FISH:
Dat what I ast ya!
ENSEMBLE:
You are what you is You is what you am
THING-FISH:
And DAT de trufe!
ENSEMBLE:
(A cow don't make ham...)
THING-FISH:
I meant dat now!
ENSEMBLE:
You ain't what you're not
THING-FISH:
Not even hardly...
ENSEMBLE:
So see what you got
THING-FISH:
And you got a lot o' lookin' t'do, junior!
ENSEMBLE:
You are what you is
THING-FISH:
Dat entirely TOO CORRECT!
ENSEMBLE:
An' that's all it 'tis!
THING-FISH:
Uh-HUHHHH!
ENSEMBLE:
A foolish young man
THING-FISH:
Bring dat dummy ovuh heah 'n show it to 'em!
ENSEMBLE:
Stashed away in SAN QUENTIM Ate de mys'try potatoes
THING-FISH:
Told ya 'bout dem 'taters!
ENSEMBLE:
EVIL PRINCE was inventin' Now he talk like de THING-FISH
THING-FISH: (manipulating the dummy)
(";Hmmmm, Saffiiiee!";)
ENSEMBLE:
An' he look like a MAMMY!
THING-FISH: (manipulating the dummy)
(";See de mammy, now! See de mammy, now!";)
ENSEMBLE:
His fav'rit CO-LOG-NUMM...
THING-FISH:
Smell like...
SISTER POTATO HEAD BOBBY BROWN, SISTER GHENGHIS ADONIS OSMOSIS, SISTER JASMINE NOXEMA TAPIOCA:
CHITLINS!
ENSEMBLE:
Is de one dey call 'SAMMY'!
THING-FISH:
One-Adam-Twelve...see de mammy...
ENSEMBLE:
He finally layin'
THING-FISH:
Armed 'n dangerous, reproach wit cautium!
ENSEMBLE:
De whole thang down, 'Cept de NIVEA LOTIUM!
THING-FISH:
Rub it on good, now!
ENSEMBLE:
An de ROYAL CROWN!
THING-FISH:
Take good care o' dat ";ASH";!
ENSEMBLE:
Do you know what you are?
THING-FISH:
You's a wimp...she's a shrew!
ENSEMBLE:
You are what you is
THING-FISH:
Got dat?
ENSEMBLE:
You is what you am
THING-FISH:
One-Adam-Twelve, see de mammy agin'!
ENSEMBLE:
(A cow don't make ham...)
THING-FISH:
And it never will...
ENSEMBLE:
You ain't what you're not,
THING-FISH:
Unless SCIENCE do somethin' 'bout it!
ENSEMBLE:
So see what you got!
THING-FISH:
I KNOW dey woikin' on it...
ENSEMBLE:
You are what you is,
THING-FISH:
Underneath VIRGINIA!
ENSEMBLE:
An' that's all it 'tis!
THING-FISH:
BOOG-BOOGMMM, Dano...";MAMMY ONE";! They toss dummy #1 into the wings, an d introduce dummy #2 to HARRY & RHONDA. Their torture-chairs, (on a rolling platform), are wheeled to center stage. The action takes place all around them.
ENSEMBLE: (showing Dummy #2)
A foolish young man
Of de negro persuasion
Devoted his life
To become a caucasian
He stopped eating pork
He stopped eating greens
He trade his dashiki
SISTER OWL-GONKWIN-JANE COW-HOON: (manipulating the dummy)
(";Uhuru!";)
ENSEMBLE:
For some Jordache Jeans!
He learned to play golf
An' he got a good score
Now he says to himself:
";I AIN'T NO...";
THING-FISH:
";NIGNINT!";
ENSEMBLE:
NO MORE...HEY! HEY! HEY!";
THING-FISH:
One-Adam-Twelve, see de ";NIGNINT"; wit knife... proceed wif cautium...knife may be open...
ENSEMBLE:
BWANA MA-COO-BAH
HARRY:
All Right! Let's go!
ENSEMBLE:
MERCEDES BAINNNZZZZZ!
ENSEMBLE:
Who is who?
SISTER OWL-GONKWIN-JANE COW-HOON: (singing)
I don't know...
ENSEMBLE:
'N what is what
SISTER OWL-GONKWIN-JANE COW-HOON:
Somethin' I just don't know...
ENSEMBLE:
'N why is this
SISTER OWL-GONKWIN-JANE COW-HOON:
Tell me now...
ENSEMBLE:
Appropriot
SISTER OWL-GONKWIN-JANE COW-HOON:
That's a funny pronunciation, If'n ever I heard one!
ENSEMBLE:
If you don't like
SISTER OWL-GONKWIN-JANE COW-HOON:
Where'd you get that word?
ENSEMBLE:
What you has got
SISTER OWL-GONKWIN-JANE COW-HOON:
Appropriot? The word is not!
ENSEMBLE:
Drop it in the dirt
SISTER OWL-GONKWIN-JANE COW-HOON:
Drop it, yeah!
ENSEMBLE:
'N let it rot
SISTER OWL-GONKWIN-JANE COW-HOON:
I can smell it now!
ENSEMBLE:
Someone else
SISTER OWL-GONKWIN-JANE COW-HOON:
Here de come, here de come!
ENSEMBLE:
Will surely come
SISTER OWL-GONKWIN-JANE COW-HOON:
I told you he was comin'!
ENSEMBLE:
'N pick it up
SISTER OWL-GONKWIN-JANE COW-HOON:
That's right!
ENSEMBLE:
'Cause he wants some
SISTER OWL-GONKWIN-JANE COW-HOON:
An' he wants it for free!
ENSEMBLE:
And when one day
SISTER OWL-GONKWIN-JANE COW-HOON:
There will come a day!
To be continued... |
