It was like March, April
Fuckin Lebra (Fuckin, um, shit)
Torus, born in 1775
I'm like 300 and somethin, but I'm still alive
I used to hang with the original, billy the kid
You probably think I'm only playin but, I did
My daddy's were a 2 headed freak show
Mama a fortune tella, Azmerella Zella
Anyway they had sex on a Oija board
And I was born the next day
(Who?) Violent J
When I was 14 I tripped on the train track
And I was crushed right there, on the steel rack
I'm out cold, they though it would fuck me up
I got up and itched my butt, and I'm like, what?
Everybody tripped and called me the clown devil boy,
Child of the Witch heifer, whatever
Tied me up burned me and threw stones
Had a few scrapes and cuts, Smokey Nuts
After that they started bowin and shit
Prayin to me, you know how those primatives get
I said get off my dick I ain't a savior
I'm what ya call a juggalo, and all I want is my flava
4 simple things in this bitch before I die

I want a rusty ax
I wanna know voodoo
A fat bitch named Bridget
And a little sip of Faygo too
Till I get my shit in this motha fucka
I will neva DIE!


(Ah, hell yeah, so anyway...)
50 years passed all my homey's are old ass fucks
I ain't even got hair on my nuts
I left the village in the search of my ends,
I wrestled Alligators, battled terminators
Nothin ever killed me, nothin could harm me
I fought in the civil war, Yankees army
I walked across enemy lines with a mack 10
Man they didn't even have that shit back then
How you just gonna come in my shit and fuck it up?
Well at least make this shit sound real man, damn!
I walked acrossed enemy lines with a, lantern
Steddy takin cannon balls, to the balls
The war ended, I traveled the country horse back
Until this fool tried to horse jack
He put his gat to my head and blew my face up
Didn't even smear the makeup
I took his gun a put a divet in his neck
The sherriff didn't like it, I got endited
87 long years in the state pen
Till they finally forgot why they put me in
They had to let me go, can't hold me on nothin
On they way out they like,
";Yo ain't you like a houndred and somethin?";
I'm said Yeah thats right,
And I ain't gonna die till I get my shit motha
fucka!!!


I want a rusty ax
I wanna know voodoo
A fat bitch named Bridget
Just a little sip or two
Till I get my shit in this motha fucka
I will neva DIE!

To be continued...